“Local Logic” or Lost In Translation

[From January 22, 2010]

There’s also all da ada kine ethnicities logic but if you chop suey’um all togedda den its LOCAL kine yeah.

So one time me and M was trying fo’teach her DH how to play Sakura/Hanafuda right. We was showing him all da related pic-chas see da flowas, 5cent, 10 cent, 20 cent. See da stork da moon whatevas. M puttum’ all in da catagories right and we said see all dis same. SEE da same same kine. DH who is originally for East LA (odale vato?) says: “I don’t see anything that is the SAME. Same means they are exactly alike and there is nothing exactly alike.” Technicalities yeah, aysos. Me & M look at each ada, SAME BUT DIFFERENT! Plus we gotta pause fo’tink what is da HAOLE word for “same but different”? HELLO! SIMILAR! We was all proud of ourselves we figured out da haole word of da day, Similar. Yeah, they’re related like same family but different. OK, DH understood “similar.”

Anden my #2 was laughing cause her was telling me to explain the Same But Different concept to her friend. And I said “Think of two brothers that you wen “makeout” with, Same But Different.” Same family hah but still yet different. AKA NOT dat same same. LOL

My Fahdah use to say “KILL DA LITE.” Smartass child dat I wuz/am would stand next to da light switch and ack like I stay stabbing’um to death. I learned not to do dat afta da belt wen whizzing across my okole. LOL – I can laugh now, no was funny back then.

ME I say “THROWEM’ IN DA SINK.” You know like da dishes and stuff. Or like laundry, “THOWEM’ IN DA WASHA.” Perfectly correct right. My smartass kids stand at da table or where ever and ack like dey going literally throwem across da kitchen and into da sink. So I have to givem da stink eye and dey laugh and say “WOT you said throwem.” Dey neva get da belt, but I go afta dem and dey run away cause dey know if I catch dem I going PINCH.

Its not so much logic yeah, more like things get lost in da translation or maybe cause it needs translation. LOL But dats da beauty of it, ain’t it? It keeps things interesting, to say the least.

One time at my cousins house, my #1 had a plate to take home and she asked my cuz, “NT Do you have a sack?” My cuzin, Kauai girl yeah, she wen look at me wit dis big eye long neck clueless look. My #1 was looking at both of us like WTH… ANDEN da word came to me and I looked at my cuzin and yelled PACKAGE! ALL three of us just busted out laughing. Moe worst now my cuz says SACK and my daughta says PACKAGE.

Back in da day wen I first was married and still had my just off da plane Tita-accent. OMG me and DH – him from Oklahoma and me who could not talk straight English fo’save my life. Auwe, use to be too funny. Like DH is da first person to ask me what does bumbai/bumbye mean? I was like HUH? I tawt a-body knows what bumbai means, I tawt dat was English. It took a whole day to come up with one haole kine answer. Bumbai means bumbai – NOT NOW Bumbai. And da bugga could not undastand dat! I had to find haole words, and I had one real limited straight English vocabulary back in da day. Still yet now kinda chopsuey but I know moe den I use to. LOL Swear to God it took me ALL day to figure out, bumbai means LATER, bumbai as in kinda like by and by. SEE da buggah undastood Later and by&by AND so how come he no could tink it, not now bumbai. Auwe. LOL